Is it just me or do kids completely blow anyone else’s minds? We took the girls to their first dentist appointment today (I know, I know, we should have done this FOREVER ago- but it’s better late than never, right?) and honestly I was so blown away by how well they behaved. Although we have found ourselves on the receiving end of some pretty sweet compliments about these girls (from complete strangers, no less) while we were in high intensity situations, I somehow still manage to assume wrongly about them and I have no idea why. They have proven themselves time and time again.
To be honest, I put a considerable amount of effort into preparing them for changes or new situations we may find ourselves in. If we are going to be doing something new, I try to start talking about it days in advance so we can start working through any feelings they may have leading up to whatever it is we will be doing. I do this for them, but I also do it for me. I am a planner. When I wake up in the morning I automatically start making lists in my head regarding what I hope to accomplish for that day. When I lay my head down at night, I revisit the list and see what I was successful at (and what I wasn’t) and start making rough drafts for tomorrow’s list. Lists, plans, bullet points… they rule my life (seriously, you should see how many lists I have in my phone, on my actual planner, and on my fridge, it’s a bit nauseating). Having an outline for my day is just how I function best. I’m not super strict about the plan, but I like to have a general sense of how I see the day going. So naturally as soon as the girls were old enough to start understanding concepts, I started telling them “the plan.” They know what to expect from me, and what I expect of them. It’s something that I have been lucky works for them as well as it works for me, honestly.
And yet, somehow, I still find myself thinking that they may not be prepared enough. And so there I was, standing outside of the x-ray room with Zoey and her dad, watching Isabella gag and squirm when the dental tech put the bitewing in her mouth, thinking “shit. I did not prepare her for this.” I could feel my heart pass it’s resting heart rate at lightning speed as I saw Zoey’s eyes widen. I looked at Steve, nodded at Isabella, and mouthed something like “help her NOW.” But as soon as he started to interject, she got a hang of what the dental tech needed her to do, and a few seconds later she was done and Zoey was willingly sitting in the chair, following the tech’s every instruction, no problem at all. As our visit went on, they followed each instruction calmly, hardly moving as they watched the movie play on the screen above the dental chair they laid in. At one point the dental tech looked over at me and mentioned that she had a feeling Zoey would be her “superstar patient.” And I realized I had been completely wrong for doubting these little girls. I forgot that while I know them pretty well, they are still their own people. And in reality, while I may have a pretty good instinctual idea about what is good for them I am learning about who they are along side them.
There is a saying… one we all know. “Mother knows best.” From here on out, I’m changing that to “Mother knows best-ish.”